Mrs.Devi Venugopal
Educational Psychologist,Indonesia

We are going to discuss a hot debate topic and consider two topics.

  1. Ongoing Debate: Is Technology Good or Bad, how the kids use at home and in school.
  2. Strategies that work setting healthy Boundaries. Latest research shows that average screen time of teens is six hours everyday. (www.commonsense.com)

Let’s answer the common questions which angst in us.

  1. What are the biggest concerns relating to tech use at home?

Focus study time is disrupted, they often get into the rabbit hole of Youtube, which makes them to be passive and procrastinate their work. Conflicts arise between parents and kids when they don’t align with the set boundaries, the constant persuasiveness to get additional screen time annoys the parents especially by the end of the day.

  1. What are some digital tech strengths?

The benefits of technology list go on, you can have all the information under your thumb, you can connect with your loved ones at any time, distance doesn’t matter. There are unlimited resources.

How do we use digital technologies in a balanced way as a family, find quality content, set expectations around healthy use, to prevent conflict, and raise media savvy consumers and creators?

All about Balance:

Ask Yourself: Is my child:

  1. Physically healthy and sleeping enough?
  2. Connecting Socially with friends and family (in any form)?
  3. Engaged with and achieving in School?
  4. Pursuing interests and hobbies (in any form)?
  5. Having fun and learning in their use of digital media?

If the answer is yes, then your child has learnt the way to navigate around technology, but if your answer is no, then you need to ask them how to work on the areas which they are struggling and set some clear boundaries.

Whenever you give your child a digital device such as phone, PS5, laptop, inform them that it is your property and you are allowing them to borrow and use. It is a privilege not their right. Don’t feel bad to say “NO”. At the same time, when you want to help, don’t give advice, ask them where they are struggling, listen with empathy, and give the assistance they need. As a parents instinct we want to resolve the problems, if you do that time and again, you are depriving them the opportunities to problem solve. Just reflect, when you were teenager, what was important to you?

  1. Friends
  2. Family
  3. Fitting in
  4. Self-expression
  5. All of the above.

They also want the same and want to test new areas to become independent person.

What are the powerful good tools we can offer to our future generation?

  1. Social Connection : When they use technology to stay connected with family and friends, research shows that technology provides positive benefits on well-being and mental health.

But if they are using social media to just lurking others content, can produce a negative effect.

There are different uses of screen time which lead to different effects

  1. Procrastination = Passive use
  2. Social = Active use (Like chat, post, blogs, write and share)
  3. Tweens as creators, and not consumers of technology.
  4. Personalized Learning – Students learn at their own pace and access to diverse resources.

What are the bad consequences
which causes concerns?

  1. Trouble focusing on one task at a time – Multitasking is a myth, especially when you are doing a focused creative work. Research shows that multitasking takes mental effort and leads to more errors and less productivity. A person also needs recovery time from distractions and to return to original task.
  2. Difficulty is knowing when to unplug – Some students have difficult setting boundaries and knowing when to switch off – “During adolescent development, brain regions associated with the desire for attention, feedback, and reinforcement from peers become more sensitive.
  3. Social Media’s Effects on Well-Being – Technology has a mediating role, Snowball Effect, existing personal challenges can lead to increased and maladaptive use of digital technology.

What questions we can ask to take care of the negative consequences?

  1. Is my child ready for a social media account?
  2. Does my child have the require maturity and resilience to manage potentially negative online social interactions?
  3. Will my child come to me with any problems he/she encountered online?
  4. Does my child show kindness and responsibility with time and behavior towards others?
  5. Does my child listen to rules and follow rules? Will he/she agree to the limits I see?

What can we do as parents?

  1. Parents as role model especially while using digital devices, need to set boundaries with free digital device.
  2. Engage in open conversations about social media, its usage, safety and security.
  3. On setting limits : its ok to set different boundaries for siblings as each one’s strength and weaknesses are different.
  4. Right or Priviledge? – The devices for kids are priviledge not a right, you have the right to take it when they don’t stick with the set boundaries.
  5. Finally, You Got This!!!